livin the dream :)

DECEMBER 2011

So December is always a very special month to me because some of my VERY BEST FRIENDS on the whole earth have a birthday this month :) So, I am always grateful to this month for bringing me them. (IN ORDER OF BIRTH)

John Arthur Roesler

Casey James Grace

Zachary David Knowles

Gina Rae Apsey

I love them all very, very much and wish them to have the best 22 year of their lives <3

In December, I was grateful for:

-the season of giving

-the excitement of a new year

-the excitement of getting my own classroom

-starting my resolutions :)

But mostly, in December, I was grateful to lived another year of my life with the people that I absolutely adore. I am so blessed to have the very best of friends, an amazing family, and a job that allows me to do something I love. I won't be doing this whole being grateful on a monthly basis thing next year, which probably means that I would have time to do so, but that doesn't matter. I was grateful for 2011 and all the changes it brought my way. I had a nephew and a niece be born, made new friends, got new babies, and grew with my family in ways I never thought I would. The new year is going to bring so much to my life and I can't wait to see what the world has in store for me.

:) Christmas

BCF.

November 2011.

I could never have imagined the way that Novemeber 2011 would ever change my life. I think the main reason that I have been putting off posting in my blog was because I knew this would be one of the hardest post I would ever have to write. I am not sure how it is going to go or if it is going to make sense, but I will do my best to do justice to my beloved extended family.

For November, there is no list of extra things I was grateful for, because the only thing that comes to mind are my cousins.

For as long as I can remember, my cousins have been my best friends. They hold that awkward place between siblings and friends, where you guys can fight and your parents can discipline them, but you still kind of HAVE to love them, you know? I have so many good memories of my cousins, especially those that are my age. There are about a million of us and most of this will probably apply to the grandkids in my age range, not because I love them more, but because I know them better.

Memories I will always hold dear to my heart:

-cousin's nights

-cousin's cabin

-water balloon tosses

-guessing the candy in the jar

-family birthday parties (and birthday bags)

-that calendar that had MOSTLY all the right information about the family's birthdays/anniversaries

-that back room at the Houston house that now holds canned food

-the clubhouse.

-when the John Webster's would come visit from Mexico

-Bree slumber parties

-the first family reunion up at that cabin (when I first met the Mark Webster family)

-the Grandma Webster prayer

-that whole week at the hospital

-Grandma and Spencer's funerals

...and so much more.

Mostly, I want to end this post with a small tribute to Spencer Ryan.

I'm not sure that many people knew or understood the kind of relationship Spencer and I had. I turned to him for more than I ever really thought I did. He helped me so much in my life and I could not be more grateful to him for that. I could never put into words how I felt after I received the news. It's one of those moments where you know your life will never ever be what it was before. I love all my cousins very much but Spencer and I had the longest "Best Cousins" run of any of the others. Every card I received from him for as long as we were buying each other cards had "love your favorite cousin Spencer" on it.

We had an understanding of the Webster family that...is not easily explained. If I was ever going to attend a family function, I would first text Bree to see if she was going to be there and then I would text Spence. They were my lifelines. I never thanked him for what he has done for me. His kind words and huge hugs are sorely missed, everyday. I know somewhere up there he is hanging out with the coolest people, doing the coolest things. To know Spencer was to love him and envy the zeal he had for life. If I could be half the human being he was, I would consider my life a success.

I thought that maybe my words could do him justice, but I am not sure that I did. I don't have the words for how it felt, feels, and will feel for the rest of my days until we meet again. I know that he would have been proud if I had written even one line, so I will close by saying that I was so blessed to know you Spencer Webster. Not to just know you, but to love you and be loved by you. I like to think that before we came to earth, we were all hanging out up there. We loved each other, but not enough to live in the same home together, so we chose to be cousins. I like to think that maybe I was this lucky on purpose. You were such a gift to my life and I must have done something right to have you in it. I will miss you forever and love you for longer.

BestCousinsForever.

Moms & Pops

So, here's the deal, I understand that it is almost March of 2012 and that I have failed absolutely miserably at this whole blog thing, so I gave up on actually caring :)

Here is to OCTOBER 2011.

Things I was grateful for-

-Well, Halloween of course.

-Breast Cancer Awareness

But mostly, October always makes me grateful for tribulations and obstacles in life, which in turn makes this post actually about my Mom and Dad.

I don't know how much I actually care to share on the subject. However, in my life, I've lived through days that would end up totally altering my family. I watched my family go through so much, that at times it didn't make any sense to me. But the reality of the situation is that life would never be what it is without those days. Watching my mother go through cancer, twice, and my dad be sick for 9 years, has made me who I am and gave me the ability to be as strong as I can be. I don't know that actually talking about that time would do me or anyone any good, but I am grateful for all that happened. I am grateful for my parents and what they bore so that we could still live relatively normal young lives.

I don't say it enough, but I love you Mommy and Daddy <3

Thank you for everything.

BEEF: It's what's for dinner.

OH SEPTEMBERRRR.

Things I was grateful for:
-Obvi, my birthday and that I made it through that horrific evening and next day.
-My parents who made it all possible :)
-I have a lot of family birthdays in that month, so also grateful for their births.

However, when it really came down to deciding what I was ESPECIALLY grateful for in September, one thing really stuck out in my mind.

It also happens to be the birth month of my beloved best friend:

BRITTANY RENEE BURGIN

my.beef.

I don't know if many of you know about this girl, Brittany Burg, cause she didn't really exist before we met junior year in Mr. Nebels AA English class, but she is one of the most beautiful souls to grace this earth. From the moment we sat next to each other in that class, we have had adventure after adventure. Collectively, we have made the art of mirror picture taking into an art. I always tell people that Britty is the only girly part about me :) She is the best friend anyone could ask for. I am sad that for three some odd years now we have lived so far apart, but that's okay, because she has NEVER, ever failed to be there for me <3 I am lucky to know her, let alone love her as much as I do.

she is the best little snuggle bug ever :)

You may think the amount of photographs we share is a bit much, probably because it is, but maybe we just really like spending time together and really like making people jealous of our sweet love.

If I could even put into words how much of a blessing this girl has been in my life, then I would be writing for years, because she is nothing short of a miracle to me.

I can't wait until she has little munchkins so that I can be the best aunt and spoil the life out of them.

If we have been this in love and shared this much in just the short five years we have been best friends, I can't wait to see what life has in store for these beefs.

Britty- I hope you know how much you mean to me and how much our friendship has saved my life. You are one of the best people I know and I feel so fortunate to have you. You are beautiful, genuine, sweet, selfless, smart, loveable, and down right beefy. We have been through so many things and I have never once felt like I couldn't go to you and always know what to say and how to help. You are so classy that it almost hurts my brain. I know you are destined to do some great things with some people's teefs and I can't wait until you fix mine! Thank you so much for all that you have done, do now, and will do for me. You have made my like a bajillion times better by just being in it. I love you so.so.so.so. much.

Oh, and don't think I forgot about the beef duck at all.

It's pretty much our best thing.

You are the love of my life.

beefs.forever.

fail fail fail.

So as I sit here on this fine Saturday morning doing English assignment after English assignment and eat my beloved honey greek yogurt, I reflect on what a failure I was at blogging this year :(

Sure, I made a few posts, but most were at the wrong time or about nothing important. ugh.
Anyway, I decided that I am going to write two separate posts for what I was grateful for in September and October :) only seems fair.


put homework on hold, finish this yogurt, and turn up pandora <3

Besides sleeeeep.

Everything I do has the word "WORK" in it.

If I'm not at WORK, I'm doing homeWORK and when that's done, I WORK out...then I sleep.

Everyday. Everyday. Everyday. Everyday.

I can't slow down.

Special Friends :)

So, I know it's nearly the end of September and I haven't even written in here to tell you what makes August so special :)
A few extra things I was grateful for?
-The end of summer weather... oh wait?
-Ashley's beautiful birth <3
-The cute extra things my work does.

So... in August, I decided I was extra grateful for my amazing FRIENDS.

The friends I see everyday, the friends I haven't seen in a while, and the friends that I won't ever see again.

Now, this is not to say that I'm not always grateful for you guys, but I would like to show you a little extra appreciation in this post.
The funny thing about me, and almost anyone will tell you this, but I have a million and one best friends. If you aren't my best friend, you probably use to be :) It's weird, because people say you can only have one best friend, but I don't think that's true. I have my best friends that I've had my whole life, the best friends I made in junior/high school, the best friends I made college, my best work friends and then the best friends that actually came in the form of sisters <3

Because this post is so general and directed towards ALL my friends, I don't want to mention names or pick people out because whether you are my best friend, old friend, good friend, kinda friend, or use to be my friend... you were at one point or another special in my heart. So I want you to know, YES ALL OF YOU, that I am very grateful for you.

THANK YOU:

-for aiding in the shaping of my life.

-for helping me on days that I couldn't stand.

-for making inside jokes.

-for understanding when no one else could.

-for thinking of me.

-for keeping my secrets.

-for sharing someone else's secrets with me.

-for listening.

-for playing.

-for loving <3

If we aren't really friends anymore, well I just want you to know that... there was a time when you meant a lot to me. I am sorry for whatever happened to us, and at anytime I am willing to try again.

Lastly, this summer was a blur of good times, and bad. I will never forget those two days. Staci and Bryce, you will never, ever be forgotten.
I love you <3

June 24, 2011 <3

July 30, 2011 <3



I hope you never feel like you are alone.